Hello, just recently my DH and I found out that he is not going to be
able to father a child of his own. They say that about 3% of the male
population was just born like that. He produces NO SPERM what so
ever!
My DH and I met in 7th grade and started dating in high school. We
always had discussed how we wanted kids and that 1 was out of the
question, 2 didnt seem like enough, 3 was just a bad number and 4 was
perfect! So we did the sain thing and lived by ourselves first before
living together just so we would have that experience and never regret
not doing it. We have been together 9 years but have only been
married 2 1/2 of those. Anyways we always wanted 4 kids and never
questioned that there was a possibility that we couldnt have them. We
tried as soon and we got married and nothing. I went to the doctor
and I have PCOS and so the DR said that it was me and it would just
take more time with me. I switched doctors after another year and he
suggested getting DH tested. It was him...and a little me still.
So me and my DH thought we knew what dirrection we were headed in and
so we built our life for a future family. We bought a house that in 3
bdrm and 2 bath that we could grow into and out of. We both have very
good professions and have always been safe with money so our children
could get a new car on their 16th birthday and go to college and be
whatever they wanted. Everything in our lives thus far has been about
"when we have kids" ad "our kids". Then to have this happen it just
freezes you. You dont believe it. You question God as to why he made
you always dream of having a family and being responsible and then he
doesnt even give you all the ingredients for them. This is very hard
on me and my DH and our relation****p and life. Where do we go from
here, who are we if we cant have kids. I cant stand it when people
tell me that I can just adopt because there are so many children out
there that need good homes. Well those people have thier own
children, why didnt they adopt instead? People always think they are
helping but that is crap!!
So I would like to use a sperm donor but my DH is still frozen. He
doesnt know what to think or what to do. The doctor told me just to
wait for him because this is very hard on men. It rarely ever happens
that a man is born unable to father a child. So it is back to just
wait and see what happens, just wait and try not to think abut it,
just wait and things will go as planned...THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN
DOING THE LAST 2 1/2 YEARS!!!!!! When do I get a say? Where is my
voice? Why does everyone think they can just put me on hold about a
baby? I want a baby and that is what I have decided so everyone else
needs to jump on board right?
If anyone has any advice for me please help! I think that I am gonna
go crazy and that is an understatement!!!!!
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